


Trust me to trust you

by wookieoogie



Category: (여자)아이들 | (G)I-DLE
Genre: All good at the ending, But still angsty, F/F, Frustration, I cant take angst you know, I promise, Neglect, Trust the tag, YuYeon, angst at first, badass soojin, drunk Soyeon too, drunk shuhua, little mimin, sooshu - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-03
Updated: 2020-11-05
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:42:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27362923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wookieoogie/pseuds/wookieoogie
Summary: If all else fails,Would you be there to love me?When all else fails,Would you be brave, to see right through me?
Relationships: Cho Miyeon/Minnie Nicha Yontararak, Jeon Soyeon/Song Yuqi, Mimin, Seo Soojin/Yeh Shuhua, Sooshu - Relationship, Yuyeon - Relationship
Comments: 16
Kudos: 89





	1. Tension

**Author's Note:**

> The summary is an excerpt from the song "Same Ground by Kitchie Nadal"

“Should we try the new club that opened a few blocks away?” Minnie asked, fiddling with Miyeon’s hair whose head was on her lap. “I heard CUBE was an exclusive partner and co-owner, so we’re safe in case any of us, you know, get a _little too wild._ ” 

Most of the members agreed almost immediately, Soojin unable to disagree with an overly excited Shuhua who almost forced her to say yes. Not that she doesn’t want to, but she was too lazy to go partying when they just got their first-ever rest day after months of unending promotions. Miyeon’s response was already expected since it was her girlfriend’s idea, so she would support it no matter what, and she missed the outside life, too.

Soyeon on the other hand was hesitant, trying to be rational and logical since she was their leader, but eventually agreed when she saw the pleading eyes of the crackhead trio, rolling her eyes to express her dissent but pulled out a smile after. She knew the girls could handle themselves in terms of alcohol and its repercussions, knowing one or the other would be silently watching their partner’s behavior. She had her mind worrying about her _own_ partner, however.

Yuqi kept silent, slouching at the far end side of the couch across Soyeon. The girl had been explicitly avoiding her, keeping her distance and blatantly ignoring Soyeon whenever she would ask the younger girl what was wrong. Yuqi would normally respond with a glare, much to Soyeon’s confusion, in all honesty, before Yuqi would dismiss her immediately. 

“Yuqi ya, you coming?” 

It was Shuhua who noticed that Yuqi hadn’t confirmed nor expressed excitement with their plan yet, and as much as the others would love to shut the all-too-straightforward maknae, they waited for Yuqi’s response instead. 

“You’re unusually quiet,” Shuhua added, which earned a slap from Soojin and uneasy eyes from Minnie and Miyeon. 

They’re all aware of the heavy tension between Yuqi and Soyeon. They had been screaming their lungs out for the past few weeks, after all, and neither of the members was brave enough to confront a raging war between the lovers. Well, Shuhua once did, out of curiosity but mostly with pure intentions and concern, only to receive harsh backslash and further intensifying the argument of the two. 

* * *

_“Look! You’re being unfair to Shuhua now!” Soyeon yelled, realizing that they might’ve hurt the youngest with harsh words when she was trying was to stop them._

_“Me? Really, me? You’re the one who told her to shut up!” Yuqi fired back._

_Shuhua shrunk on her seat as the two fought continuously, feeling a little guilty that they ended up arguing more because of her. If it hadn’t for Soojin finally snapping and interrupting them because she saw the guilt and uncomfortableness in her girlfriend’s eyes, the two would never even thought of stopping. Fortunately, they did and angrily went to their respective rooms, slamming the door shut at the same time._

_“Wow, they’re still in sync even if they’re not on good terms,” Shuhua joked, trying to hug Soojin to show her utmost love and appreciation for what she did, but was quickly ignored by Soojin who instantly went back to the kitchen._

* * *

It started with small banters, Soyeon being a tease to Yuqi and the latter barking back and sulking after. It didn’t mean anything at first, as it was a usual sight already between the two. It was their trademark dynamic. But the small banter turned to insults, then to silly arguments, to Yuqi shouting and Soyeon just dismissing her and laughing at her cuteness, and to now, in which there would not be a day where the two would yell at each other for unknown reasons. The members clearly had enough of it and they stopped listening to whatever they were arguing about since they all knew only the both of them could fix it, too.

“Yeah, I’m coming, of course. Why wouldn’t I be?” Yuqi responded casually albeit a little irritated. 

Shuhua shrugged, and before she could open her mouth to speak, Minnie quickly interjected.

“Great! Miyeon’s driving. See you all at the parking lot at exactly 7 PM! No buts and late excuses, please. Try to keep your hands until we get there.” She quipped, smiling sheepishly before quickly dragging Miyeon to _their_ room—which is Minnie’s room but who cares. 

Shuhua and Soojin were forced to go back to their own apartment considering that they don’t have any clothes at the current place, and seeing that Soyeon and Yuqi had stomped their way to their respective rooms. 

“I’m sensing a break-up.” Shuhua blurted out casually.

“Have a little faith, will you?” Soojin scolded softly, but she too had her own share of doubts about the two. The argument had stretched for far too long for what she could remember, and neither showed any hints of reconciliation. Even her fight with Shuhua—which happens more often than she wished for, mostly Shuhua’s annoying but equally adorable jealousy—only lasts for about three days or less. She wondered how they could even withstand their seemingly endless disputes if they truly do love each other. Or do they?

“I wish they still have that, too.” Was all Shuhua could reply, to which Soojin just only hummed in agreement.

Surprisingly, all of them met up at exactly 7 PM, shocking even Miyeon with Shuhua and Soojin’s promptness. But then again they wouldn’t want to add any more gasoline to the fire that started between their leader and her lover. Not when they’re supposed to have fun at the club and try to forget, for once, their idol lives and be who they really are without the cameras. Still, they all kept in mind to be careful not to be too _intimate_. Not everyone was as liberal nor as understanding nor accepting of same-sex relationships yet. It wasn’t a secret among the idols, but it wasn’t a comfortable topic either. It’s still, unfortunately, considered _taboo_. 

The ride to the club wasn’t at all unpleasant, but it wasn’t relaxed either. The growing tension and awkwardness from a quiet Yuqi and pretentious Soyeon didn’t sit well to create a cozy atmosphere to start long, and pleasant conversations. Yuqi was usually the one who initialize talks and offer random topics, and Shuhua would join with the loudness. But right now, as much as they appreciate Shuhua’s attempt to create a vibrant and easing atmosphere, with Soyeon trying her hardest to fill-in Yuqi’s lack thereof (which the members noticed), it didn’t go well as Shuhua and Yuqi’s dynamic and minds was far different from Soyeon’s. Shuhua had to be even extra careful with her choice of words and jokes in case it might easily offend either Soyeon or Yuqi. 

As soon as they arrived, Shuhua was quick to scramble outside the van, dramatically stretching her arms and breathing in the fresh air before yelling, “Freedom!!”

Soojin rolled her eyes and playfully slapped her shoulder, which earned a look of a grimace from the younger girl. 

“You gotta admit it was SUFFOCATING there, god!” Shuhua exclaimed, flailing her hands, “They either need to make it or break it or else!”

“Or else what?” 

It was Soyeon’s sharp and annoyed, if not threatening, tone that sent shivers down Shuhua’s spine. She quickly hid beside Soojin and gave Soyeon a sheepish grin.

“She meant that you should talk to Yuqi, Soyeon,” Soojin spoke, eyes full of concern, “Or it will affect not only you but also the group in the long run.”

“Alright everyone, time to get the party started!” Minnie yelled, dragging—again—Miyeon inside and leaving everyone else behind, not wanting to either witness or be involved in another drama. 

Shuhua followed hastily with a reluctant Soojin, who gave one last look at Soyeon before the two disappeared. Now it leaves her and Yuqi—who’s been trying to find her phone at the van for minutes now, and Soyeon obviously refused to help her—behind. It took a few minutes before Soyeon heard the van slid close behind her, small footsteps following behind. She expected Yuqi to at least try and walk beside her, but she was highly offended and deeply hurt when the latter only passed by her and continued walking. 

“Yuqi—”

“Don’t talk to me.”

Soyeon didn’t give any bullshit and grabbed her wrist to stop her.

“What the hell is wrong with you, Yuqi?!” Soyeon almost begged. _Almost_.

“Oh, so now you’re asking me,” Yuqi hissed, turning to look at Soyeon with an unreadable expression, “When did I ever matter to you, anyway?”

“Of course you alwa—”

“I don’t.” Yuqi was quick to interrupt her, which earned a confused look from Soyeon. “Because if I do, then you wouldn’t be even asking what’s wrong.” With that said, Yuqi pulled her arm back and went ahead to the entrance, leaving a tangled mess of a baffled Soyeon behind. 

Soyeon wasn’t sure what she did wrong. No matter how much she tried to recall her moments with Yuqi before this thing even started, she couldn’t find any of her faults, and Soyeon was too prideful to just apologize without a reason, and Yuqi would never accept an unknown or half-baked apology. Was it something she said during their practice? Was she too hard on her? She just wanted the best out of her, and everyone knows that. Did she forget an important date? No, she meticulously made sure she had saved every important date that involves her relationship with Yuqi after the girl had sulked for days when she accidentally forgot their _monthsary_ once. 

She raffled her hair in annoyance as she walked inside, unable to find the cause of Yuqi’s sudden outburst towards her. They weren’t talking nor spending time as much as before so it’s definitely not something she said. Normally, Yuqi would insist to stay at her studio until late just to watch her work or accompany her. If they’re not in their studio, they’re either doing promotions or shootings, so where exactly was she coming from? She’d often tell her that she’s not spending time with and or giving her attention, but that’s just Yuqi being clingy and she’d always explain it to her, to which Yuqi understood.

The fact that Soyeon couldn’t understand Yuqi at all even frustrates her. Her lover was better at this kind of role. Unbeknownst to everyone, Yuqi could be very perceptive and sensitive, much to Soyeon’s delight since she needs every ounce of understanding and patience knowing how stubborn and hard-headed she could be. But no matter how much everyone saw their amazing dynamic of not needing words to know what the other feels or has in mind, Soyeon could never read Yuqi the way she does with her. 

She slumped herself at the stool counter beside Soojin, who had her eyes fixed on a certain maknae at the center of the dancefloor that was obviously a little tipsy with the amount of beer she chugged earlier because of a stupid challenge.

“Took you long enough to enter. Have you guys talked?” Soojin asked carefully, but not letting her eyes off Shuhua.

“I tried. She doesn’t seem to want to.” Soyeon replied dejectedly, ordering herself a drink as well. “She quickly dismissed me when I asked her.” After a few moments of silence, Soyeon added, “Do you have any idea why she’s like that?”

Soyeon saw how Soojin’s eyes flashed hesitation. Of course, she had an idea. Everyone comes to her when they needed to let out and just want someone to listen, even Soyeon does that most of the time. Perhaps Yuqi did that once when she was away. 

“Soojin, please.”

The way Soyeon pleaded broke Soojin’s heart. She hated seeing her this way, utterly lost and puzzled. But she knew better than to get herself involved, and respected the boundaries of relationship whenever necessary unless it concerns the whole group. 

“I can’t,” Soojin replied, before she quickly added, “But one thing I can tell you is to listen to her.”

Soyeon squinted her eyes. ‘But I always do—”

“If you were, then you wouldn’t even be asking her what’s wrong every single time.”

With that said, Soojin left Soyeon to ponder before she went to Shuhua, who’s now about to fight a drunk Hui fist-to-fist; a sight to behold indeed, but certainly not a pleasant memory to remember if Soojin lets it happen. She quickly pulled Shuhua away from the growing crowd, much to the younger’s protest, but Soojin, surprisingly raised a middle finger at Hui when she heard the male shout indecent phrases to her girlfriend, effectively silencing everyone as the couple made their way somewhere more secluded.

“That was fucking hot, Jin-ah!” Shuhua managed to say in between slurs before Soojin threw her on the couch exclusively reserved for (G)I-DLE (perks of having CUBE as a partner and co-owner). Shuhua tried to pull the girl into a kiss but Soojin begrudgingly pushed her away. Not that she could ever resist Shuhua at all, but the younger was making it hard for Soojin to stop herself from tackling her down. 

“Thank you,” Shuhua eventually muttered, resting her head on the crook of Soojin’s neck instead. 

In an instant, Soojin’s hand was on her head, caressing it lovingly, protectively. “Of course,” she said firmly, almost sounding possessive even, “I’d never let anyone hurt you.”

Soyeon pondered on what Soojin said. It was the exact same words Yuqi told her a while ago, and to say that she was not suspicious was a lie. Her feelings only intensified when her eyes caught Yuqi with the person she was jealous of the most, _Lucas_. She clenched her fists, not really in the mood to even bother to care at this point. But she does, and she could only sigh from afar. 

Soyeon was never a great listener like Soojin, or as playful as Shuhua, as sweet as Minnie, or as kind as Miyeon. She wasn’t exactly the best person nor the best girlfriend, and she always knew Yuqi deserved better. So when the feud between them started, only god knows how it scared the shit out of Soyeon every night, fearing the day where Yuqi would realize how awful she was and finally decide to end things with her. 

No one knew how she cried every night, wishing to crawl into the arms of her lover for comfort and assurance, but was blatantly rejected every single time. She tried, god she swore she tried, to figure everything out and even went out of her way to fix whatever was happening between them. 

_‘If you were listening then you wouldn’t ask her what’s wrong every single time.’_

Soojin’s voice suddenly echoed in her mind. And maybe that was the message Yuqi had been trying to convey. 

With a conclusion that wasn't even confirmed, but she held it dearly because that was the only explanation she could ever think of as to why Yuqi never showed any interest in reconciling, or Yuqi not wanting to talk to her anymore, or Yuqi suddenly being cold and ignoring one morning; Soyeon clutched her chest and swiftly downed her drink. It burned her throat but she couldn’t care less. It never even bothered her if she had to face their vocal coaches the other day, no. She didn’t even realize the tears that welled up her eyes and were now streaming down her cheeks as she downed another drink. 

_Another one._

_And another._

_One more._

This was what Yuqi must’ve wanted. This was what Yuqi had been telling her. Maybe she wasn’t able to give the love she deserves, or maybe she wasn’t just enough in general. Maybe Lucas was a lot better and to be honest, a safer, secure, and practical option. But Yuqi never loved him. What a loss. 

Soyeon choked out a bitter laugh, thinking it was her who brought Yuqi into this tough situation they’re in now. It’s her fault. Always been. That must be why. 

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

_That must be why Yuqi had been telling her indirectly that she wanted to break up._


	2. Intention

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter: [@wookieoogie](https://twitter.com/wookieoogie)

The countless times where Soyeon ignored her long-time girlfriend, Yuqi forgave her, including the several slip-ups with regards to the former forgetting dates that mattered to Yuqi the most. She’s a hopeless romantic, after all. The little things and sweet, cheesy actions were the ways to swoon Yuqi and make her feel loved, needed, and acknowledged. Call it delusional, immature, over-the-top expectations, or idealistic, she doesn’t care. She knew she deserves it.

Soyeon gave her those, made her feel like the most important person in her life, and gave her the attention Yuqi craved and wanted the most. She never missed a beat. She treated Yuqi the way she treated her music: her utmost priority, or maybe even more. Yuqi became her muse, her world, her everything; she practically needed her to be by her side to stand courageously against the currents of the pressure the world had been giving them. She was her rock, and Yuqi never once failed to give her strength.

However, Soyeon was also easily consumed, and Yuqi knew it very well. From the times Soyeon would choose the comfort of her studio than what her arms could provide when the latter seemed to be carrying the world in her shoulders, or the times Soyeon ‘accidentally’ forgets their _monthsary_ because she was too occupied creating songs (songs that were mostly dedicated for Yuqi, as she had mentioned before, which made Yuqi, as the hopeless romantic she was, easily flattered, forgiving her in just a matter of seconds), or the several times Soyeon would inevitably neglect her needs to finish her work so she could spend more time with Yuqi—a promise that was rarely ever fulfilled.

Yuqi tried her best to be the understanding girlfriend she was, knowing how responsible and dutiful Soyeon, she knew better than to be a distraction to her. But she also knew when she’s had enough, and when she’s clearly being taken for granted. She did her best to fix it, talk it out to Soyeon and explain her feelings. The latter, at first, immediately considered and made several adjustments for Yuqi. Soyeon felt guilty for making her lover insecure and anxious. However, those precious moments were quickly robbed once again just a few weeks later. Yuqi was upset, but she understood. She tried to, at least. She doesn’t have much choice, does she?

The vicious cycle continued, where Yuqi would calmly tell Soyeon her feelings, explain to her that she felt being a second priority in Soyeon’s life. She understood that work comes first for Soyeon, and it was normal, really. But being always the second option, the difficult choice, the other consideration when work seems to be okay, was a different matter. And it all went down when one day, in Soyeon’s studio, Yuqi had to remind Soyeon again that she exists, and that she was her girlfriend, and she’s tired of doing this stuff all over again with her because frankly, nothing really changed aside from a week or so of adjustment in Soyeon’s part.

“You’re so needy, Yuqi-yah.”

It was a joke. It was supposed to be.

But it was the last straw in Yuqi’s sanity to further stretch her weary patience, and she knew at that moment, she exploded.

Yuqi was never a fan of shouting, of curses, of unending and repeated rants that seem to evaporate into nonsense eventually when said more than ten minutes. But there she was, spitting fire out to Soyeon with exaggerated gestures, hoping that the loudness of her voice or the extremeness of her motions finally shook the older girl of her existence, of her girlfriend’s existence.

Soyeon was taken aback, that was clear from the way she froze at her seat. But much to Yuqi’s dismay and confusion, Soyeon smiled at her. Yuqi wasn’t able to wrap her head around her reaction, because why on earth a person would smile after letting out her pent-up feelings and sufferings? Was she a joke to her?

“You’re so cute when you’re mad.”

And with that said, Yuqi stormed off Soyeon’s studio, aggressively wiping the tears that streamed down her cheeks as she stomped her feet at the empty hall. She heard her name, yes. But she never felt any other movements, not even an arm that was supposed to wrap her waist to give her assurance, or that soft breath in her that only spoke of words of love and encouragement. She slowed down a bit in hopes of something. But there were none, not even one, and frankly, it wasn’t the first time. She walked further down the hall and never looked back. Not like there was even something to look back to, after all.

* * *

Yuqi was having a blast with her best friend, Lucas at the club. She missed him dearly, and she was completely absorbed in the conversation with him as they caught up with the events of their lives after they separate ways. She was aware of how Soyeon was jealous of the guy, and Yuqi never missed a chance to reassure her that there was nothing between them regardless of the many and growing fan base that ships the two. Soyeon would just growl in response and let her talk to Lucas, but would still continuously remind—or show if she couldn’t say it—that she was uncomfortable.

Lucas was harmless. In fact, he was incredibly adorable! Yuqi knew about Lucas’ secret relationship with a guy, but he was too adamant to not reveal the identity of his lover.

“Privacy,” Lucas once said, “And protection.”

Yuqi understood. One of the downsides of being an idol. This was the reason why all of Soeyon’s suspicions were meaningless in the first place since Lucas was already in a relationship. But of course, she could not reveal that to Soyoen, as wished by Lucas, and she respected that. The lesser the people who know, the slimmer the chances of being caught and involved.

Yuqi’s enjoyment was unfortunately cut off when she felt a tap on her shoulder. It was Minnie.

“And I thought we’re supposed to keep an eye on our partner.”

Yuqi furrowed her brows, and Minnie just rolled her eyes before she pointed from across the room. There she saw a small blonde at the counter, with numerous shot glass and a few bottles beside her. Her head was hidden between her arms and Yuqi doesn’t need to get close to know who it was. She had memorized every single detail and figure of that person that she could immediately recognize her even from afar.

“What about her?” Yuqi asked indifferently.

“Oh god, Yuqi, have a heart, at least!”

Yuqi had to bite her lip at that comment to refrain herself from telling a snide remark. Instead, she remained unmoved.

“There were already a few men who approached her—”

And that seemed to alert and awoken whatever part of herself that wanted to protect Soyeon almost immediately. She straightened up, gave Lucas an apologetic smile before she turned to Minnie.

“I got it. Guess we’ll be going home first.” Yuqi mumbled regretfully. Lucas just gave her an understanding nod and smile, completely aware of the rough scenario between the lovers.

“Miyeon could drive—“

“No. We’ll just take a taxi. It’s fine, thank you anyway.”

Minnie squinted her eyes. “Are you sure? I’m really worr—”

“It’s okay, unnie. I promise. I’ll text you when we’re back.”

Minnie nodded reluctantly and went back to Miyeon, while Yuqi made her way towards her lover, who seem to be laughing alone and swaying her body unconsciously. She had her eyes fixed on her, and when Soyeon was about to fall off the seat, she sprinted to her side and caught her in her arms, earning a chuckling blonde afterward.

“What?” Yuqi asked softly albeit quite annoyed. The blonde seemed to not show any signs of standing up straight, and instead hugged Yuqi by the waist and putting all her weight for Yuqi to carry.

“You’ve always been my savior,” Soyeon slurred, “Always catching me when I fall.”

“Alright, you’re drunk. We’re going home.”

“But I'm already home!” Soyeon tried to sit up straight. With the high stool she was sitting in, her height was almost the same as Yuqi, and so her eyes, though half-closed, stared straight into the beautiful brown orbs that she so wanted to be drowned in. “You are _my_ home.”

If Yuqi wasn’t all too caught up with her frustrations to Soyeon, and if Soyeon wasn’t too drunk right now, she would have taken that statement into her heart. But she quickly dismissed her words and slung one of Soyeon’s hand in her shoulder, pulling her to her side as carefully as she could before she guided her steps towards the door.

“We’re leaving.”

Soyeon flinched slightly at the sternness of Yuqi’s voice, almost void of emotions, of affection, of _love_.

The moment they were outside, Yuqi hissed under her breath when she struggled to carry her drunk girlfriend and trying to halt a taxi at the same time. She figured this was a lot faster than booking. Suddenly, she felt her shirt getting damped. Her head instantly turned to Soyeon in concern that she might have to throw up anytime soon, but was surprised to see that the latter was… _crying?_

“Yuqi-yah, don’t leave me,” Soyeon choked, breathless. Her weight beginning to get heavier as the urge to just kneel and cry became more and more appealing the longer they waited, and the longer Soyeon stared at the concrete floor.

Yuqi hissed, and upon hearing that, Soyeon cried harder.

“Please don’t leave me, Yuqi-yah. Don’t leave me,” Soyeon now practically begged, like a mantra she chanted to cast a spell. But Yuqi was unresponsive, cold even. And Soyeon swore her fear just swirled into her head like a cyclone she couldn’t escape, the alcohol only adding to the intensity of what she felt. She looked up at Yuqi whose eyes were unreadable, her voice melting with the noise of the outside and for the first time, Soyeon couldn’t understand her.

“Get in!”

Soyeon heard Yuqi yell, and she blindly followed the unknown voice. She couldn’t recognize Yuqi anymore, she couldn’t recognize this Yuqi beside her that’s so stiff and emotionless. She reached out to hold her hand, to know if she was still there, to feel her warmth and comfort that made her at ease and safe from the harsh world. She yearned for her love.

As soon as Yuqi felt Soyeon’s hand, she instantly pulled back. She briefly caught a glance of hurt, pain, betrayal, surprise, and other mixed emotions that flashed through Soyeon’s eyes. In her drunken state, she looked completely conscious and aware of her happenings, Yuqi thought. But she completely ignored everything and stared at the moving lights that danced through the window. At this point, she just felt completely numb.

“Yuqi-yah,” Soyeon called out, trying once again. “I’m so—”

“Let’s break up.”

It was as if cold water was splashed at Soyeon’s face with the sudden statement that she froze, her face paled and her throat dried. The tears that she thought were gone suddenly welled up again in her eyes, and the earlier intoxication of alcohol almost instantly left her system and was replaced by an excessive amount of adrenaline rush. At that moment, she badly wanted to leave. Despite having the feeling earlier that this would happen soon, she wasn’t prepared nor was she ever prepared, and no matter how she tried to set aside the fear, she didn’t expect that it would be hitting her sooner than she expected, or that it would really happen.

“You can’t be serious.” Soyeon breathed out, her voice wavering. It was only when Yuqi finally turned to face her with that stone-faced expression, yet in her eyes, she still looked so beautiful and breath-taking, that she finally got her answer. _Twice_.

“Soyeon, let’s break up.”


	3. Redemption

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter: [@wookieoogie](https://twitter.com/wookieoogie)

_“Soyeon, let’s break up.”_

“YUQI-YAH!!”

Soyeon quickly woke up in a jolt, trying to catch her breath while her head pounded in pain but she quickly dismissed it to search for a particular person. As soon as she felt the familiar arm that wrapped loosely and protectively around her petite figure, however, she breathed a sigh of relief, leaning closer to the person’s chest to listen to the sound of her heartbeat. Immediately, it calmed her down.

“Soyeon? I’m here, I’m here.”

She heard Yuqi whispered in her ear while her fingers continuously ran through her hair. She whimpered, burying her head closer to the crook of Yuqi’s neck.

“I thought you left,” Soyeon muttered, clutching Yuqi’s shirt harder than she intended.

“Why would I leave?” came Yuqi’s reply, planting a soft kiss on her lover’s head.

Soyeon let out a shaky breath, trembling slightly with last night’s memory, or dream? She doesn’t know exactly since she barely remembers a thing or two, and her headache only getting worse the more she tried recalling what happened. As long as Yuqi’s by her side, she doesn’t really care.

“You broke up with me.” Soyeon felt Yuqi stiffened, but Yuqi was also quick to wrap her arms tighter around the older girl. She didn’t realize that tears were already streaming down her eyes when she tried to tell Yuqi what conspired last night in her thoughts. “You were cold. I couldn’t recognize you. Then… then,”

Before Soyeon could even finish her sentence, she broke down into a crying mess, chanting Yuqi’s name in her breath as if it was the only thing that mattered at that moment.

Yuqi furrowed her brows, her lips tight as she cradled her lover in her arms.

“I’m not going to break up with you,” she assured, but her thoughts meant otherwise. _‘I was supposed to.’_

Yuqi’s mind momentarily went back to where she was talking with Lucas and telling him her plan of actually ending things with Soyeon, seeing that the latter was better with focusing on their career instead, and Yuqi doesn’t want to further distract her. Their comeback was near, and the only thing she did with Soyeon was to argue non-stop, and she could see how it had been affecting Soyeon and the group for a month now. Her heart couldn’t carry anymore all the guilt, frustration, and shame she caused just because of her insecurities. But when she saw the Soyeon last night, passed out with dried tears in her cheeks, and the vulnerable Soyeon right now in her arms, she just doesn’t have the heart to break and shatter Soyeon further.

And god forbid that Yuqi doesn’t break soon either.

* * *

“I thought you’re breaking up with her?” Shuhua asked casually, munching the muffin Soojin made for her. They’re currently at the cafeteria at Cube to pass time until their next class, while their other members were either busy practicing, or making songs for their next comeback.

Yuqi sighed, playing with the muffin in her hands. “I don’t know…” She muttered. “I mean, you did notice the change, and it wasn’t like before.”

Shuhua just hummed in agreement.

“You see, she was never like this. She has never been this consistent, and she’s making it hard for me to just... do it.” Yuqi burrowed her face in her palms, an exasperated sigh following afterward. “I honestly don’t know what to do. I’m confused!”

It has been a month since the encounter with Soyeon’s vulnerable side after the club incident, where Soyeon was literally passed out on the counter, and the rest of the members decided to go home already since Shuhua had been getting out of hand, and Soojin’s complaining non-stop, while Minnie didn’t have a choice since Miyeon, being the kind-hearted spirit she was, offered and insisted that she drove the kids home. Minnie was hesitant, but agreed eventually as she saw the drunken state of her two members. She made sure to bring home more drinks just so the older ones can further enjoy the night.

Soyeon became _affectionate_ , so to say, to Yuqi after that day. She doesn’t exactly know why, but the latter, despite her busy schedule because of their upcoming comeback, had been visiting her studio late at night to either hangout or remind her to eat dinner, Soyeon bringing food for the both of them. There were even several instances where Soyeon would purposely tease her on-cam and claiming her like how Shuhua claims Soojin. Added to that, Soyeon, as much as she could, had been choosing to sleep in Yuqi’s room to cuddle with her, and surprisingly, to let out her frustrations about their work to Yuqi.

Not that Yuqi complains, in fact, she honestly loved the Soyeon right now. It felt like the old Soyeon she once fell in love with back in the days, but she was confused, highly, and extremely confused with the older girl’s recent attitude and behavior towards her. Yuqi had been asking herself, of all the time where Soyeon could be like this, why now? Why now when she internally decided to end things with her?

The more Soyeon becomes loving, the more Yuqi becomes tight-lipped. She tried once to finally let out her thoughts and put an end to whatever they have, but as soon as she entered the small studio, and was greeted by a cute, yellow figure that hugged her like there was no tomorrow, she knew her heart would never dare erase that bright smile in her lover’s lips. For that reason, all the previous scripts she internalized in her head were quickly forgotten and thrown away. Soyeon had never been that excited to see her before.

Yuqi snapped from her trance when Shuhua kicked her under the table, a groan escaping her lips and she shot the maknae a confused glare.

“Incoming,” was all Shuhua replied.

“What do you—”

“Jagi-yah!”

And there she was, the topic of the day, hopping her way cutely towards a blushing mess of a Chinese girl. With Soyeon’s large, yellow hoodie that almost made her look like a kid, and her black, cat-hat ears that bounce when Soyeon squeezes the tail, Yuqi could only stare blankly with a huge grin on her face as she anticipated Soyeon’s arrival. Shuhua, on the other hand, just smirked at the view of her lovesick friend.

“Yah!” Yuqi scolded softly as soon as Soyeon crash-hugged her before the latter sat on her lap while still playing with the cat ears. “Why are you here?”

Soyeon pouted, “Can’t I see my girlfriend?”

“Oh jesus, I’m out!” Shuhua quickly interrupted and made a gagging face before she scurried away and went to find her girlfriend instead.

Yuqi shook her head, a soft chuckle reverberating her chest; a sound that Soyeon so lovingly adored, and a sound that reminds her of _home_. “What I mean is, don’t you have work?” Yuqi inquired, a tinge of sadness briefly flashed her eyes. She was already expecting Soyeon to prioritize work above all.

“I have,” teased Soyeon, before she smirked when she saw how Yuqi looked down and avoided her gaze. She gently placed a finger on her chin to lift her face so they were looking in each other’s eyes before she said, “But I miss you. Work can wait.”

“You’re kidding me,” Yuqi blurted out, earning a soft laugh from Soyeon.

“No! Why would I?”

Yuqi couldn’t stop herself from grinning wide and Soyeon’s heart warmed at the sight of her giddy lover, barely refraining herself to actually tackle the girl and smother her with lots of kisses. They didn’t mind the eyes that were staring at them at the cafeteria, not that the people were unaware of the relationship between the two, but the scenario was actually quite refreshing to see and a little unusual, most especially to Captain Soyeon. But miracles exist like how Soojin once kissed Shuhua randomly in front of the many trainees. Who knew a tsundere could be the sweetest when she could not get ahold of herself when she was excited?

* * *

“Yuqi ya?” Soyeon called softly from the door of Yuqi’s studio, peeking her little head inside to check if her lover was busy.

Yuqi jumped in surprise but quickly motioned for Soyeon to come in. It was already late at night, and she was finishing her song for the comeback and after that, she’ll go home. Soyeon recently had been the first to visit her studio to remind her to take a rest and suggest that they go home together. It was her habit before, so it was still an uncommon feeling for Yuqi to see Soyeon in her studio, waiting for her, despite doing it for the past month already. The idea, or even the thought of breaking up with the girl was slowly fading into nothingness.

“Hey, are you done?” Soyeon asked, flopping herself on the sofa and hugging the large giraffe plushie she gave Yuqi when she got her own studio.

“Yeah, just a few more lines, and I’m done,” Yuqi replied, not looking at her lover while she scribbled messy lyrics on her notebook.

Soyeon pouted but nodded afterward. _‘This must be the feeling of waiting in my studio,’_ she thought, as memories of Yuqi falling asleep in her studio flashed her mind. She suddenly stood up, making her way towards her lover and wrapping her arms around her shoulder. She felt Yuqi stiffened in surprise but eventually relaxed in her embrace.

“Soyeon?”

Yuqi felt her breath hitched when Soyeon’s lips began to leave feather kisses on her neck. Her eyes frantically looked at the doorknob, checking if it was locked in case someone suddenly barged in. They were still at the company and the chances of someone intruding was extremely high. Furthermore, they haven’t done _it_ for ages, and Soyeon initiating while they’re working? That’s just adding more to her confusion.

“Soyeo— ah!”

Yuqi quickly covered her mouth, her eyes widened in surprise from the unexpected sound she made. Soyeon just nipped on her sensitive spot, just below her ear, before her lover sensually licked the bruised mark. She felt Soyeon smirk, and god she swore she just felt hot despite the cold temperature of her studio.

“You should visit my studio instead.” Soyeon casually commented, moving back to the sofa and settled herself, a satisfied grin plastered on her face seeing the flushed cheeks of her lover. “It’s soundproof, you know?”

“Stop! Oh my god!” Yuqi covered her face in embarrassment, unable to face the smug look of the older girl.

“What? It’s been a while since we—”

“JEON SOYEON, I SWEAR!”

“Did that…” Soyeon finished, earning a groan from her lover. She felt herself laughing at the self-conscious expression of Yuqi, but decided against it as she was too soft for a cute Yuqi instead. Her eyes softened at the sight, and despite trying her best to listen attentively to whatever Yuqi was muttering or rambling, she couldn’t pull away from her thoughts of wanting to please the younger girl. Without second thoughts, she suddenly pulled Yuqi to her and quickly caught her lips with her own.

“I love you.” Soyeon blurted out, staring right into Yuqi’s eyes, caressing her cheeks with her thumb lovingly before she slowly leaned in for another kiss. It wasn’t exactly the feeling of fireworks or the sweet sensation described in the movies, no. It was slow, not passionate, but it was loving, full of yearning, and Soyeon had to pull out in panic when she felt Yuqi’s tears in her fingers.

“Babe, why, why?” Soyeon cooed, quickly pulling Yuqi into her arms, which Yuqi gladly obeyed and straddled Soyeon’s waist before she buried her face in the older girl’s shoulder. Soyeon could feel her lover trembling, and that only made her wrap an arm protectively at Yuqi, the other hand soothing her back. “What’s wrong Jagi-yah?”

“You’re confusing,” came Yuqi’s reply in a hushed voice. Soyeon tried to pull Yuqi away to look at her, confused at her statement, but the younger girl shook her head and only tightened her hug around Soyeon. “You’re never like this. You were never this affectionate to me. What’s with the sudden change, Soyeon?”

Soyeon caught the slight tinge of pain in Yuqi’s voice, and she knew where this conversation was heading. Right then, she listened attentively.

“I was supposed to end things between us.” Yuqi continued, sniffing a little.

Soyeon stiffened, the fear from her previous dream rushed back to terrify her, make her anxious and doubtful, but she remained unmoved.

“I was supposed to break up with you and just let you on your own. I’m becoming a distraction for you. For the group, too. We never stopped arguing day and night, and the more I see the pain in your eyes because of me, the heavier the burden my heart carries. I couldn’t take it. I’ve always thought you’re better off without me. I’m nothing but a distraction to you, Soyeon. We’re better off as frie—”

Yuqi’s vision suddenly became distorted when she felt Soyeon’s strength overpowering her, and the next thing she knew, she was lying on the Sofa with Soyeon on top of her, straddling her waist. Realizing that Soyeon had flipped their position, she remained indifferent albeit confused.

“Now you stop there.” Soyeon’s voice was stern, firm, annoyed even.

Yuqi couldn’t look back at the intense stare of her lover, ashamed of what she said and felt over the past months. She bit her lip to stop herself from crying, but the tears just flowed naturally out of her eyes. She felt Soyeon’s finger on her chin, moving it to face her, asking to look at her. And Yuqi did albeit reluctantly.

There was a moment of silence, just two hearts beating the same beat and two eyes longing.

“I was scared,” Soyeon admitted, this time, she’s the first to break the eye-contact. “I was so scared of losing you. I knew I wasn’t the best out there, and handling me or even having me could be such a pain in the ass.” Soyeon smiled bitterly when she felt Yuqi’s hands cupping her cheeks, tenderly wiping her tears. “But here you are. Still with me, trusting me, loving me. Harder than ever. I’m amazed and thankful because you stayed. I know I have taken your love for granted, and I am sorry. So, so, sorry. I wouldn’t even be surprised if one day, you come to realize that I’m no longer worth your time and understanding…”

With each tear that dropped into Yuqi's cheeks, she felt pain, but at the same time relief. She never saw Soyeon break down before, much more that she’s even admitting her fault and apologizing, and pointing out the feelings she felt throughout their relationship. She felt happy, and finally, acknowledged.

“Soyeon—”

“Please let me finish.” Soyeon choked out, sniffing a little before she saw the encouraging smile her lover gave. God, that same smile that continuously forgave her shitty behavior, the same smile Yuqi endlessly offered in understanding her stubbornness; the same smile she deeply, and madly fell in love with. The smile she swore to protect against anything to keep it.

“I was a jerk for not listening, for not giving you the attention you deserve. If that club thing didn’t happen, I may have been too late… I’m sorry I had to be drunk for me to realize everything. I’m sorry that it took this long for me to apologize and make up for everything I did to you. I know it wasn’t enough, but I promise to be a better person for us. Seeing your smile made me realize what an asshole I am to take those lovely things from you. I love—”

Soyeon wasn’t able to finish when Yuqi aggressively yanked her collar down and soon, soft pair of lips met her own.

“Just shut up and kiss me.”

And it didn’t take more than a second for Soyeon to crash her lips again to the owner of her heart, mind, and soul. She was thankful, beyond thankful, how this beautiful creature ever loved the depths of her flaws and stayed beside her despite only introducing pain and hardships to her. And maybe, just maybe, that’s what love meant, after all: _Trust_.

Trust that the other would never leave despite seeing the ugliest, or experiencing the shittiest. Trust that would transcend the logic, the rational, and remain loyal and undoubtful of the love the other shows and gives.

_Trust that your lover trusts you, too._

“Should we transfer to your studio?” Yuqi asked after the heated kiss, a little breathless.

Soyeon stared down at the goddess below her, smiling ever so lovingly as she caressed her hand on her cheeks, tracing the features of the person she cherished. Yuqi closed her eyes and leaned in at the warmth, smiling ever so lovingly with the long overdue, and rare affection of her lover. At that moment, they knew what they wanted. With Soyeon melting in Yuqi’s arms and lying on top of her, arms around her protectively and tenderly, she finally felt safe. She closed her eyes and basked with the familiar feeling.

This was the Yuqi she loved and recognized.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

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.

.

“No. Just cuddle me. I missed you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeobbeun! 
> 
> As much as I love writing angst, I can't, for the life of me, carry the heavy feeling in my heart whenever I read such stories, in including mine! I hope you are satisfied with the ending, however. Let me know what you think! 
> 
> Also, do you guys have any Twitter account I can follow?

**Author's Note:**

> Yeobbun!
> 
> I wrote this at around 1:30 as I couldn't sleep, I wanted another YuYeon fic and so here it is! This is a one-shot story, but I decided to divide it into 3 parts as it has gotten too long. I hope you all enjoyed this as much as I enjoyed writing it! Please do support my other stories about (G)I-DLE as well!
> 
> Follow me on my Twitter: **[@wookieoogie](https://twitter.com/wookieoogie)**. I always do random polls for my stories. Watch out for that!
> 
> Drop comments/requests/suggestions on my curiouscat: **[wookieoogie](https://curiouscat.qa/wookieoogie)**. My answers are always posted on Twitter, too!


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